He dozed with the lights on and his legs above the sheets. His cell phone’s trill jarred him from his twilight. He swung his arm toward the nightstand and picked it up. “Yeah?”
“Oh please - no greeting?” He heard her laugh. “I require a hello!”
A smile spread over his face as his feet spread over his sheets. “Hello you.”
“Hey.” He heard her smile.
“What’s up? I’m thrilled you called me.” He lazily rubbed his belly through his t-shirt.
“So you broke up huh?” He heard her take a sip.
“And you know this how? Oh wait. You read the blog. Oh come on, let’s flirt a little first. I’m in a mood. We’ll talk later,” he put his arm under his head as a rest.
“You’re always in a mood.” He heard her giggle. “Come on, talk to me.”
“We’re taking a break,” he rolled onto his side and then sat up. His feet dangled to the floor.
“You know what your problem is?” He heard her light a cigarette.
“Oh come on kid,” he rubbed the top of his head with his hand, “I don’t want to have this conversation right now. It wasn’t a great day.”
“But I have the whole thing figured out Mark.” He heard her inhale.
“Oh Jesus woman, not tonight,” he wiped the sweat off his face with the base 
of his t-shirt and walked over to turn the air conditioner on. “It’s so goddamned hot. If I wasn’t so cheap I’d leave the air conditioning on.” He scratched his ass and then sat back down on his bed. “How are you anyway?”
“We’ll get to me in a minute.” He heard her take another drink.
“What are you drinkin’?” he reached over and picked up his water glass.
“Diet Pepsi.” He heard her inhale another puff. “So, want to hear my theory?”
“Your theory on what?” he swung his legs back in the bed and put his arm behind his head.
“Oh why you two broke up!” He heard her move her phone to her opposite ear.
“No, I don’t want to hear your theory,” he lifted his head and flipped his pillow and resumed his rest, “because then we’re gonna talk about why you and I broke up and then we’re gonna decide that I’m an asshole and then you’re going to feel better and I’m gonna feel like shit. So, let’s save the energy. I’m an asshole. I’ll admit it.”
“Well you’re acting like one!” He heard her take another drink.
“Ok we’re drifting away from the whole flirting thing sweetheart,” a smile spread over his lips. “Ok what? What’s your theory?”
“Ok.” He heard her enthusiasm in her voice. “Do you remember the movie The Way We Were?”
‘Ok what?” he chuckled, “you’re kidding right? You’re going to reference my life to a movie?” He flipped on to his side. “Jesus woman, at least reference a song lyric. We could sing!” he threw his arm over his eyes.
“Shut up Mark,” she sounded impatient. “We went out so I don’t need to reference anything.” She hit the word reference with a force to hammer it home. “I thought it would make it easier to get, so shut up and let me make my point. Ok? Can you just shut up?”
He nodded his head.
He heard her laugh. “I so know you. You just shook your head. Didn’t you?”
“Yeah I did. Ok tell me your theory,” he relaxed, rolled over, and pointed his toes with a stretch, “So yes, I saw the movie. How is this my life?”
“Ok do you remember the story? Robert Redford is Hubbell and Barbra Streisand is Katie.” He listened while she recapped the plot. He pulled a sheet over his legs and stuffed it between them. He hated when his knees touched.
“Ok, so why am I Hubbell?” He asked while staring at his ceiling.
“You’re not!” He almost heard her roll her eyes.
“Ok wait woman,” he sprung up and swung his feet over the side of his bed. “Are you fuckin’ telling me that I’m the woman in this story?” he wiped the sweat off the top of his head.
“Yeah, exactly.” He heard her gearing up to make her point.
“Ok back up here,” he stood up and slid his feet into his slippers, “I told you I didn’t have a good day. I told you I didn’t want to talk about this. And I only went along with this bullshit because I like ya,” He walked down the stairs and toward the kitchen. “You’re like the only woman I’ve transitioned into a friendship, but I’m in no goddamned mood for you to tell me this shit. Don’t tread on this tender soil baby. I don’t want to go here.”
“Where are you going?” He heard the worry in her words.
“I’m in the kitchen to grab a beer,” he opened the refrigerator door. “If I have to be castrated in the name of conversation, I deserve a beer.”
“Ok, the reason you’re Katie is because you’re so demanding and impassioned.” He took a chug while she charted the course of her case. “And you require these impossible standards to keep you. Just like Katie! Can you see that?”
“Ok what’s with women and these movie questions? Men don’t walk around and tell each other how their lives are like a plot. Did you know that? I can’t think of one time I have ever said to a guy: hey … you’re just like that guy in that movie.” He paused to take a drink. “Never once. What the hell made you think of The Way We Were?”
“Oh, an episode of Sex And The City reminded me of it.“ He heard her embarrassment.
“Jesus Christ woman!“ he scoffed. “It’s worse than I thought! My life isn’t just a film reference! It’s a fucking sitcom plot?“
She ignored him. “Can you see that you’re Katie Mark?” He heard her light another cigarette.
“I miss cigarettes,” he sighed. “I can’t believe that I quit smoking just when I so need them. It reminds me of when that guy lights both cigarettes and hands Bette Davis one. Remember that? What‘s the name of that movie?” He smirked with satisfaction.
“Shut up. I am not amused.” He heard her anger. “I’m just trying to help you.” He heard her inhale. “Hey but you make a good point! Listen!”
“Ok wait,” he put the bottle on the counter. “Let me call you right back.”
“Why? What are you going to do?” He heard her impatience.
“Woman, back up,” he laughed. “I got things to do. I’ll call you right back.”
“Ok but I remember my point.” He heard her exhale. “This conversation isn’t over yet!”
He laughed and shook his head while he sat the phone on the countertop.
“Ok so tell me why I’m a jewish woman with communist leanings?” he chuckled into his cell phone. He resumed the conversation as he sat at his table with his lone beer bottle marking his place.
“I never said that.” He heard her sigh. “Ok let’s get back to the cigarettes.”
“Do you remember when we used to share a cigarette?” he asked as he fingered a hole in his t-shirt. “I do. Jesus woman, remember what you smoked? I do. Benson And Hedges Deluxe Ultra Light 100s. I used to be humiliated when I bought them for you. The cashiers would smirk.” He laughed. “But I remember all those nights when we’d lay there and split a cigarette. And talked. We had great talks.” They grew quiet.
“Of course I remember.” He heard the stillness in her voice. “Since you quit smoking, how many times have you cheated and taken a puff?”
“Never,” he vowed, “I owe my doctor. I’ll never smoke again.”
“How much weight have you gained back since your surgery?” He heard her chew something.
“None, I’ve lost about 20 more pounds in the last couple of months,” his stomach burbled in confirmation.
“See, you never give up.” He heard her rest her case. He rested his elbows on the table.
“I don’t know what you want me to say,” he picked up his bottle.
“Well do you get what I’m saying?” He heard her echo his pace with her Diet Pepsi.
“Yeah, you think I need to loosen up,” he let out a small burp, “excuse me.”
“No.” He heard her close a door. “You just have to realize that no one is going to keep up with you. No one can keep your pace. Do you get that?”
“What are you doing?” he avoided her question.
“I walked outside. It’s too hot indoors. There’s a good breeze. And don’t avoid me.” He heard her exasperation. She knew him so well.
“I get it. No one is going to run along side me. Is that your point?” he lowered his head and put it over his folded arm. “So I need to slow down?”
“No, I’m saying we’ll try to run with you but don’t get disappointed when we stop to catch our breath.”
“I do get disappointed,” he admitted.
“Well that’s not so hard Mark.” He heard her wet her lips. “It’s easier than watching your back when you leave us behind.”
“Why don’t you just run with me?” he almost silently seeped.
“Because you left us breathless, Mark.” He heard her tears. “We can’t catch our breath.”
