Beaten Path

It’s 2:56 am and I can’t sleep. It’s so disquieting listening to one’s own heartbeat in a dark and quiet room. Coupled with the jittery physical sensation caused by my new meds, and I’ve got my personal horror show with a rhythmic soundtrack provided by the erratic metronome of my heart.

Heart failure is a powerless position. I’m a problem solver. So I’m trying to figure out what to do. I guess the power is in compliance.

It’s so odd to realize a day arrives when your body works against you and becomes both the enemy and its torture.

Why post this shit? Because I can’t walk into the street and scream and the jitters are forcing the ejaculation.

And I know I’m running out of time.

Too soon my heart will beat me to death; too soon the sounds of my broken heart will become rote.  How much longer before my heartbreak provides a soundtrack to a beaten path?

One thought on “Beaten Path

  1. I actually cried after reading this!! Please come out of that dark place. I’m the one usually there and you’re the one to pull me out. Get up and out of there…PLEASE

    Like

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